For Her

Last night I had found Annjia. I had not seen her recently, so we spoke of what I had done since we had last talked.

Again, my mind had wandered to Maengun. I asked Annjia if she was able to still feel love in her current state; I have heard that many unliving creatures lose the ability to feel emotion. To my surprise, she told me that she could, and I asked if she might help me in finding clarity. After mistaking my request as asking if she would be my mate, she had told me as the General had said: I must not question how I feel. She also said that I must show Maengun that I appreciate her. I recalled my father... he would sometimes bring a flower, or a flawless hide to my mother after a hunt. Annjia said that this was how he showed appreciation for my mother, and in turn gave to me a bundle of sweet-smelling red flowers, to give to Maengun.

Later in the evening, I sensed her presence through the tribal talisman, and asked if she might meet me on the bridge over Stonebull Lake. She agreed. I went to her, my flowers in hand. I gave them to her, and she looked at me, surprised. She asked why I had done this... and I was sure of it now. I told her that I was in love with her.

She ran away.

I would find her later, in the Commons hut. I felt weak... my heart raced, and I could not stand. I thought she would run again... but she apologized to me for running, earlier. We talked for some time... of how we felt for each other. Of her father. Of what makes her happy. She said she did feel comfortable around me, but she preferred to be alone. I had not noticed before how beautiful she was... I told her this, and she said the same of me, in turn. Then, she asked if she might be allowed to spend the night in my hut... she said she wished to sleep in a more comfortable place. She is gone this morning, but I will welcome her into my hut any time she wishes to come.

Though she had said she prefers to stay alone, and I will respect her wishes, it does not change how I feel for her. I am in love with Maengun, and I will do anything for her.

What Am I Feeling?

Everywhere I look, I am reminded of Maengun. Her smiling face sits at the front of my mind, and the quietest mention of love causes my heart to pound. It is as if the world knows that I am in love, and wishes to heckle me at any opportunity.

On Saturday night, Urukha and Pipiltin were lifemated again, to renew their vows. The General performed the ritual, and gave a speech beforehand. He said that love must be held onto, and that one must spend each day with their love as if it were their last. Again, my thoughts went to Maengun. I had not seen her since I laid her to sleep two nights ago. I wondered if she was well. I feared, briefly, that something might happen to her, and that I would not know.

I spoke with the General the next day, in Orgrimmar. I told him that I thought I loved Maengun, but I did not know if it was true. He asked me what I felt, as I thought of her... I had felt too much, more than I could say in either tongue I could speak. I told him what had happened, on the night of the tavern. He told me that love is complex, but yet it is simple. I must simply feel it, and not dwell upon it. If I look upon another and feel happiness, then perhaps it means I am in love.

When I look upon Maengun... I feel

The entry cuts out with a large ink blob after the last word.

This Is Love?

I believe I have fallen in love with Maengun.

Last night, the tribe hosted the Burning Tavern, as it does every Friday night. Shortly after my arrival, Maengun arrived as well. I was happy to see her there, and trying to learn more about the tribe in spite of her being shy. However, she quickly became drunk... I do not think she drinks alcohol often. She said she spoke with Ura, and became her friend. I was happy to hear this.

Then suddenly, Maengun fell into me, and then fell asleep. I laid on the floor with her on top of me. I could not move her, and she would not wake up. I was not uncomfortable... I think. I did not know what to think, as she had never done such a thing before. But I did not feel discomfort or pain as she lay upon me... I felt the opposite. It was good.

She would eventually move off of me in her sleep, and so I carried her to the Ravine, as I had done with Urukha before when she had had too much alcohol and fell asleep. I looked to her, and recalled the troubling stories she told me of her life. She slept in my arms, happily, and at peace. She was not tense, or burdened with the guilt she bore while searching for her father. I felt happy to see this, happier than I can recall ever feeling in my life.

Though I did not realize this until later, I am certain of the moment that I had fallen in love. As I looked at her, she stirred in my arms, and opened her eyes. She looked up to me, confused at first... I thought I might have done something wrong. But, Maengun simply fell back into her slumber, and rest her head against my arm... and smiled.

I am not certain if her actions are her own, or if it was brought upon by the alcohol. But more than ever, I wish to be there for Maengun. I would lay my life down for her without question. I want her to be safe, and happy. It is my wish to see her lips again carry the smile she wore in my arms last night. The smile forever burned into my memory.